CHICAGO (Reuters) – A woman is suing a Chicago-area zoo for a 2008 fall near a dolphin exhibit, accusing zookeepers of encouraging the mammals to splash water and then failing to protect spectators from wet surfaces, local media reported on Thursday.
In her suit filed earlier this week, Allecyn Edwards said she was injured while walking near an exhibit at Brookfield Zoo, where a group of Atlantic bottlenose dolphins were performing, media said.
Officials "recklessly and willfully trained and encouraged the dolphins to throw water at the spectators in the stands, making the floor wet and slippery," but failed to post warning signs or lay down protective mats or strips, the suit said, according to the reports.
Edwards is demanding more than $50,000 for lost wages, medical expenses and emotional trauma from the Chicago Zoological Society and the Forest Preserve District of Cook County, which operate the zoo in Chicago's southwest suburbs. (story courtesy of Yahoo! News)
Enter this as Exhibit 1,256,784,562,134,850 supporting the argument that women will never run the world. Hillary Clinton starts crying to try to get votes, Sarah Palin makes us all think twice about whether or not we really need Alaska in the Union, Heidi Montag does something at the Miss Universe pageant that I can't even describe, Jane Doe gets a dude fired for showing her how he grips his putter, and now Allecyn Edwards sues the zoo for letting their animals act naturally.
You know, as awesomely as this week started with the big family feud in Alabama, I'm giving serious consideration to going back to Germany and applying for citizenship. This isn't your office you're walking around at, lady, it's the fucking zoo. If you need a "Caution: Wet Floor" sign out near the dolphin tank to remind you that there's going to be water on the ground, then just stay home and watch Animal Planet to get your fix of God's creatures.
Of course the trainers "willfully" encourage dolphins to splash people in the crowd. How else would they get people to come watch the show. No one goes on whale watches and trips to Sea World to watch the things swim around and eat fish and krill, they want to see some action. Splashing is what puts asses in the seats, but I've never seen an aquatic-themed show where by the end of it there were asses on the ground due to wet conditions.
And $50,000 of lost wages, medical expenses, and EMOTIONAL TRAUMA?? Did this bitch slip and fall while walking around on stilts breaking up with her boyfriend over the phone? Give me a fucking break, lady. Wear some sneakers with grip on them the next time you venture out to the zoo, and throw some elbow pads and a crash helmet on just in case. And if you fall down, swallow your pride, accept the fact that you’re a klutz, and get the fuck back up.
And spell your name right. Allecyn, my ass.
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