Study: Facebook makes lovers jealous by Garrett R

Article by Chris Matyszczyk
Brief Analysis/ Expanding by Garrett Radant

It's easily done, that slide into the Facebook face-plant.

You casually slip onto your lover's Facebook page and see that his or her status has been changed from "in a relationship" to "single."

Perhaps you'd had a fight. Perhaps he or she was pressing you for a commitment, a press that you responded to with the wrong words or the wrong tone. Or perhaps you saw that your lover seemed to have a new special friend, one who delighted in commenting on every one of your lover's new photos.

Suddenly, there it all is: love destroyed by a few strokes, not of another's body but rather of a keyboard.

Some social psychologists at the University of Guelph in Ontario would like you to know that they can prove that your heartbreak is largely Facebook's fault, or rather that the fault lies in the fact that Facebook exists. After a little research, the wise brains penned a study entitled "More Information than You Ever Wanted: Does Facebook Bring Out the Green-Eyed Monster of Jealousy?"

And in their minds was the question of whether the social-networking thing enhances lovers' relationships or perhaps tugs at their essentially brittle strings, unraveling them like a cheap sundress.

It seems to be the latter. In preliminary findings, published in CyberPsychology and Behavior, the researchers found grim tales of lovers torn asunder.

Look, for example, at these words of woe from one Facebooker. Referring to his lover, he says, "I have enough confidence in her to know my partner is faithful, yet I can't help but second-guess myself when someone posts on her wall...It can contribute to feelings of you not really 'knowing' your partner."

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My bit:

I have to say, this article is...FABULOUS. Especially being a guy, let's face it, guys are typically the more jealous species when compared to women. The truth is, that guys know exactly what things other males like and the basic 'moves' on how to get those things.

More often than I like...I check certain people's profile on my own Facebook account. I hate it when the girl I like uses this: <3, when talking to some other guy. I feel immediately inferior and find myself having to talk to her again to regain confidence, that I am on top of the metaphorical food chain. She isn't doing anything wrong, I would never tell her to stop...but I also remember how I felt as a guy when I got her first message with a little heart on it. Made me think...maybe she likes me...I like her...well I do now because she is cute and gave me the "little clue" with that heart...doesn't she have a boyfriend? Is she having second-thoughts? It's the way many minds work. When people show interest, they get it in return, because most people explore options, when the option confronts them.
No one says:

"I am so happy that Astronaut School accepted me, I have always wanted to be in space (goes on for 3 days straight about gazing and constellations and ends with...) but I think I will be a coal miner.
Two things...I was clever there, astronaut and coal miner are the exact opposites, one goes into the earth, one goes as far away from it as we can. Neat, huh?
The other point, coal miner probably never confronted this person as a job opportunity... so why would the person ever think about it? They wouldn't. And that is my point...

It goes the same way with love interest. Girl shows interest in guy, guy shows it back, vice versa.

But seriously...

It drives me nuts. I am not jealous, I also have my fair share of confidence. However, I have also been hurt, no one likes that feeling. No one. Who likes second best, when you could have won first? Sure, you might have reasons for being okay with 2nd or 3rd...your friend won or you weren't planning on doing great to begin with...but really, bigger the trophy, the less you have to sound compensating with sorry excuses...

What can be done? Nothing as a whole. Facebook isn't going anywhere all that fast and frankly, neither is the hellhole that is love. Just kidding, love is...erm...awesome(ly bad).
Anyways, individually, you can talk to your left hand and let it know that what you say on facebook does not hurt what you two do together...as a couple with someone else, just be mature and LET THE SMALL THINGS GO. If things get out of control, just talk, do NOT break up over facebook and do NOT use those damned little heart to anyone but your significant other...that drives me nuts.

Later.

Garrett R.